You Only Bag Twice.

Why does it seem like wherever I go these days, anything I buy gets double-bagged? Grocery stores, drug stores, office supply stores – no matter where I go, if the total weight of my purchases exceeds that of a small kitten, they throw a second bag inside the first one.

Are they making bags weaker these days then they used to? Seems like just five years ago, if you wanted them to double-bag your stuff, you had to ask them to – but the clerk would roll his or her eyes at you, because you were clearly some kind of excessive worrier concerned that your bag would tear open during the fifty feet you carried it from your car to your house. Either that, or you were painting the house, and too cheap to spring for a drop cloth.

I’d guess this is just a reaction to a few noisy PITA (pain-in-the-ass) consumers who bitched to the right people about having their bags tear open, and the powers that be decided it would just be easier to double-bag everybody’s shit rather than receive a few complaints from people who didn’t think to ask for two bags and would rather blame someone else for their problems.

You’d think that in this time, when we’re beginning to realize just how much our polluting is messing up the planet, companies would be taking measures to decrease the amount of trash they’re putting out there. But instead, they’re doubling the amount of plastic and paper bags going into the system.

So from now on, I’m gonna ask for single bags as often as I can. Obviously, bringing your own bags is still best, but you don’t always know when you’re gonna need to duck into Rite-Aid for a tube of anal lube for your friend’s birthday present. And if your friends go through so much anal lube they need a container heavy enough to warrant double-bagging…you might want to think about finding some new friends.


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